


run girl run (this world is not made for you)

by biochemprincess



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-15
Updated: 2015-04-15
Packaged: 2018-03-23 04:02:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 627
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3753748
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/biochemprincess/pseuds/biochemprincess
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There once was a little girl and she grew up to be a hero. Until she wasn't anymore. [spoilers for 2x17]</p>
            </blockquote>





	run girl run (this world is not made for you)

**Author's Note:**

> a/n: the latest episode hurt me a lot. so here, have even more pain. let me know what you think. :)

There once was a little girl and she grew up to be a hero.

Until she wasn't anymore.

 

***

 

There once was a little girl and she was meant for more. But darkness slept in the space between her cells.

She never grew up.

 

***

 

There once was a little girl and she grew up to save the world.

Until she thought she couldn't even save herself and fell through the sky.

 

***

 

Melinda May picks Jemma Simmons from a few files on her desk - Fury's order. She's the most promising candidate. Not cleared for combat, but it doesn't matter anyway, not for what they're doing.

Melinda May doesn't know. Not yet.

 

***

 

Skin as white as snow, a girl behind a wall of glass, not dead and not alive.

This is not a fairy tale.

This is hell all over again.

Melinda May knows now.

 

***

 

She says: "She's just a kid."

She means: "I can't lose a girl again."

She means: "I can't fail again."

She means: "I picked her."

She means: "This is my fault."

She means: "Please don't die."

 

***

 

Melinda watches from the hidden corners. She doesn't allow herself to smile, but relief streams through every of her veins.

Jemma is here and she is alive, wrapped in Skye's hug.

The girl is not a lifeless form she has to clutch to her chest, trying to keep herself together.

(She checks on her later that night, standing in front of her bunk, listening to her breathing.

She allows herself to breath again too.)

 

***

 

Jemma says: "He's alive."

But May knows what it really means.

It means: "We should have died down there together."

And she understands.

 

***

 

Melinda watches from the hidden corners. She doesn't allow herself to be seen; worry is an omnipresent emotion these days.

It's not like a mirror, not exactly. Jemma's change is different from hers in many ways, but the bottom line is the same:

She is suffering in silence, with a fake smile plastered on her face.

May won't let this stand.

She won't make the same mistake, never again.

There is a file in her hands and she desperately hopes it will save Simmons.

 

***

 

Melinda says: "There is a mission. We could need you."

She means: "It's a chance."

She means: "Leave on your own terms."

She means: "Don't let yourself be swallowed by the pain."

She means: "Don't become me."

 

***

 

(They say goodbye to each other in the middle of the night.)

(They both cry when other one doesn't watch.)

 

***

 

When Jemma comes back everything has changed and yet nothing has changed.

May finds her at dawn, curled up in a ball in the cockpit of the old bus.

She wraps her in a blanket and waits for her to wake up.

In a different life, a scenario like this would have happened under different circumstances.

If May is thinking about it now, she can live with this too.

 

***

 

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"Do I have to?"

"No."

"Then I don't."

"But you should."

 

***

 

The only thing Jemma needs is support. And May is giving it, it's the only thing she can do.

Because years ago she fought and fought, until people finally left her.

Now she will fight and fight, so people won't leave Jemma. Never again.

 

***

 

The world is breaking around them, once again. It never stops.

Maybe they're not made for this world. Maybe the world is not made for them. It doesn't matter.

When Jemma pulls her into a hug out of nowhere - nobody ever comes close, she doesn't let anyone close - it doesn't feel like walls closing around her, not like she is draining somebody's life with her presence.

It feels like there's a chance they will be okay.

It feels like hope.

 

 


End file.
